a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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