What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
