I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
You took a bar mat shot.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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