I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
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