tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
