but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Terrible idea I love it
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
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