What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I wish life had little blips of pornography
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
