dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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