are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
