a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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