put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
