I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
you never un-have a 4some
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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