dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
