try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize