oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
Randomize
