I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
Randomize
