Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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