So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
