that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
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