Fine. I'll sleep in my office
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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