How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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