i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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