There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
