She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize
