we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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