Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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