I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Randomize
