I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
They took my balls.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
