U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
