Dude my mom stole all your condoms
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
Randomize
