I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize
