My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
