May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
