naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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