I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
