So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Randomize