I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
Randomize
