You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
