PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
