do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Randomize
