"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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