Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
