like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
