Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
