How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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