If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Randomize
