I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
