I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize