YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Randomize