We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
