i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
